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I have officially lost my voice.

Baby Luna is having an allergic reaction to the termite tenting that was done a few weeks ago.

I miss my Pond for some reason even though she broke my heart.

For some reason people have been getting on my nerves lately. I'm not really sure why, they just manage to upset me. Silly apes. Sometimes I feel like trading in this Sonic Screwdriver for a gun, but that would be stupid.

I don't understand this world. Everything is so much more complicated than it should be. Everyone is out to get something out of someone. I'm so sick of it again.

But I don't really have a choice.

Random tid-bit for no reason.

"Shout, shout, let it all out

These are the things I can do without

C'mon, I'm talking to you

C'mon"

As I relive the past and think about those I've traveled through this life with, I realize that even though someone of them have hurt me, betrayed me, left me alone, etc, without them I wouldn't be where I am today.

I'm getting better, my anger isn't as bottled up and I can see things from different perspectives.

But in all honesty, I've never been able to tell those people how they really made me feel so I figure as part of the healing I'd sum it all up with a few lines of song followed with a statement.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah

What you doin' to me?

Yeah, yeah, yeah

What you want from me?

Yeah, yeah, yeah

What you doin' to me?

What you want from me?

You're just fucking killing me!"

"Psycho Killer

Qu'est-ce que c'est

Fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa far better

Run run run run run run run away"

"You say you love me, you love me again

But if you love me, where have you been?

You say you need me more than anyone else, well go to hell!

Where have you been?

No way! You wish! I don't need this!

What makes you think I'd ever want you again?

Yeah right! As if! I don't need this!

What makes you think I'd ever want you again?"

"I lay my head on the railroad tracks

And wait for the double E

But the Railroads don't run no more

Poor, poor pitiful me"

Ah, that's better.

Now then for the statement...

I have no anger or ill will towards any of you. You've all turned me into the person I am today. And to be quite honest I sorta like me. So for that I thank you. And for future reference, if you ever need anything, if there's anything I can do to help you....FUCK OFF.

Thoughts.....

I understand now that sometimes I have to be the bad guy in the short-term to be the good guy in the long.

What a mess

If anyone's wondering, the reason I've stopped doing things here is because both my laptops are gone and I no longer have a phone.
Things will be back as soon as possible though....I hope.

Lots of things...

Got laid up in the hospital on New Year's day. That wasn't much fun. The bartender at my old job is now an x-ray tech which sort of put me off as it reminded me of the joke "Why can't you see your exes when you're doing WELL?"

Not much to say

My, my, the clock in the sky is pounding away.
There's so much to say.
A face, a voice.
An overdub has no choice and it cannot rejoice.

Wanting to be, to hear and to see.

Crying to the sky.

Crescendoll's crescendo

I see her behind the glass. She is beautiful, like a skillfully crafted doll. I watch her dance, I watch her sing. She is amazing, like the first sunrise of summer or the first snowflake of winter.
I laugh at her jokes and smile when she plays. She is the thing that gives me hope, the thing that makes life bearable.

But it's a lie. I look around and see others who stare at her like me. They all think she's beautiful, that she's as amazing as the first sunrise of summer. But it's all a lie.

In truth she's nothing but a doll, a perverted thing to take our minds off of real life. Something to drag us down to her level. She is dirty, ugly, a creature that deserves our pity and nothing else. She was once someone's daughter, but now...now she is nothing.

Ugh...

This flu or cold or whatever it is is going around faster than a Tumblr post...

Little baby Luna

Little baby Luna would not go to sleep last night. She wanted mommy and the Doctor doesn't mean crap when that happens.
I literally tried everything, I picked her up, sang to her, gave her another bottle, you name it. I was just going to leave her in her room (it seemed to work the first time she freaked out), but little Luna wasn't going to have that. I had totally forgotten that she knows how to open her door now and by the time I raced upstairs she was already in the master bathroom.
So I had to do it. I didn't want to, but I was left with no other choice. I took her downstairs and turned on the Imagination Movers.
Good Lord that girl calmed down. We were into the third episode when mommy and daddy walked in...

I don't think I'm gonna babysit again any time soon.

Sometimes....

Sometimes I wonder if my friends are worth keeping around.
Do they help me or hurt me?

The saddest thing...

The irony of love is not loving the right person at the wrong time, it's YOU. (points to girl) You're the irony of love. Loving YOU at the wrong time, loving you and letting the real "right one" pass me by. You're the reason I cried, drank, and lashed out at everyone.
I gave you everything I could, all my time and money and patience. And for what? So you could lie to me, treat me like a paper towel that you use to wipe the blood from your nose.
I thought you were the most important thing in the Universe, but it turns out that you were just another bad thing ruining my life.

I'm glad I'm done with you....

Weening the hallow.

I want to get a group together and go as Buckaroo Banzai and the Hong Kong Cavaliers next Halloween. Who's in?

Stupid dogs and other things...

Finally got the dogs back a few days ago. Someone had turned them in to the neighborhood security (who are such incredible pricks btw) and they promptly called me (four hours later). These dogs are more trouble than they're worth. With things going the way they are, there's no way that "Martha" (the friend I'm house-sitting for) can handle two dogs, a two year old child, and another baby on the way.
Anyway, just as we were leaving with the dogs, the property manager (who is more of a prick than the security) decides that this is the perfect time to bring up the face that Martha's yard is a total mess, something that was brought to my attention at the beginning of my house-sitting gig.
I can't stand these stupid monkeys sometimes.



On the other had, I did get to see a few good movies this week.

Tokyo Drifter, a film from the 60's about a former Yakuza trying to go straight. The film maker's use of colors in this movie is brilliant.

Tetsuo: The Iron Man, a cult classic about a middle-aged salaryman who is slowly turning into a crazed robot. I really didn't like this film. You can probably find my review of it somewhere if you look hard enough.

Wild Zero, a film that I'm watching as I write this. It's not bad so far considering it was only shot for about $50,000 US. I'll probably put a review up for it somewhere later on.



Anyway, that's about it for now. No brooding memories of love lost, no philosophical questions about sex or life or anything like that. Although if you hang around, I promise to throw a few of those in from time to time.

House-sitting sucks!

So while everyone was sitting down to a nice dinner, Jupiter's dogs burrowed under the fence and took off into the cold rainy night.
We had the entire crew looking for them last night, but to no avail. Called the Humane Society, called Jupiter, went looking for them this morning, but nothing so far...

Lonely little toy soldier

It seems so long ago that I had met her, my dear "Sarah Jane" (for that is what I will call her from now on) and her mad friends. She was such a sweet girl, such a wonderful girl. She and I got along smashingly. She understood my humor, I understood her pain. We were perfect together.
But soon it came, the day when one of my "friends" pushed her away from me. The evil bastard, I wished such a painful death upon him the like no human could conceive. But he did it to himself, he buried himself under a mound of bottles and cans in an ocean of alcohol.
My anger was unfocused, I lashed out at the world. And why shouldn't I? The world took her from me. I stood alone in my little blue box, no one to travel the stars with me.

Alone. All alone. I even enjoyed it for a while. But soon, like most things, the lonelyness came to an end. I searched and searched, for another companion. I had found a few, but none of them stuck around. I was still alone.
But one day she came back. My dear, sweet Sarah Jane. But she wasn't dear, she wasn't sweet. She had changed, of perhaps she was always like that in the first place? It didn't matter, she wasn't who I thought she was. Once again, I had chosen a silly Earth girl...and the silly Earth girl broke my heart...

So again, I am alone. So alone in this box. Such a silly old man trying to save everyone I come across, but no one to save me. So I sit and wait for the Lord to show me the way to her side. To show me the one who will ease my pain.

I wonder...what is she doing right now?

Pretty Little Angel Eyes

If you have no idea who the girl above is, her name is Komatsu Ayaka. She played Sailor Venus in Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon and is currently a rather popular model in Japan.
I bring her up today because I wanted to talk about my horrible(ly romantic?) view on life and all that.

I honestly believe that no matter who you are, there is one thing you can do, say, think, feel, have that would make anyone fall in love with you. What do I mean by that? I mean, that anyone can fall for anyone given the right circumstances. For instance, I believe that for a brief moment in time, if miss Komatsu and I were to meet and we were wearing the right clothes, thought the right thoughts, maybe even smelled a certain way, she and I would become soul mates.
It's an odd thought, I know, but just think about it for a second before you toss the idea like so much rotten fish.
I hold out hope for a moment like this one day. Maybe not with miss Komatsu (though sweet Lord almighty, I would never ask for anything ever again), but with someone who I can make happy and who in turn can make me happy.

This old box is so lonely now days...I wish I had someone to travel with, someone who would give me their heart like how I give them the stars.

Right now I believe the only thing stopping me is the ocean. And time itself. Silly thing, time doesn't stand a chance.

Keep it in your pants

Is it wrong of me to feel like I've misplaced my faith in humanity? I mean, far be it for me to think that someone, anyone, could keep it in their pants until marriage? I mean, it's not hard. All you do is keep your damn clothes on.

Why is it that the concept of sex has been so diluted down to the point where some people actually consider kissing a more personal act?

With all the sickness and disease out there you'd think people would be more careful, but no, it seems like they all WANT to get sick and die....

Silly, stupid apes...

One of those days...

Just having one of those days I suppose...
I'll get into it later...

Random Thoughts

"Dammit, I told you it needs to be MORE sonic!"

Retro Crush

Does anyone remember this girl? Her name is Azama Myuu. She played Sailor Jupiter in Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon. I had a mad crush on her a few years back when PGSM was still coming out and oddly enough I had totally forgotten about her in the years since. Which sort of brings me to my point.
In your entire life, how many people have you had a crush on?

My most recent one, let's call her "Pond" for now, was a lovely, charming girl who I had met through her ex boyfriend. She was always quick with a joke and a smile. She was also scared of the smallest thing. I remember someone turning on a light once and she jumped. She moved somewhere far away and the chance of me seeing her again in this life is pretty slim.

But honestly, do you remember your last crush? What about the one before that? And before that? You got over it didn't you?
We all get over it. Wherever we are, whatever we're doing, we all get over it.

But...
I miss my Pond...